Eleven sheep have been pinched from Jeremy Clarkson’s Diddly Squat farm in the Oxfordshire countryside, with the television presenter suggesting the culprits may have struck while cameras weren’t rolling.
The 66-year-old former Top Gear and Grand Tour host discovered the missing flock during a headcount alongside his co-star Kaleb Cooper at the Chadlington estate. Speaking to The Sun, the irate presenter delivered a stark message to the thieves: return the animals.
A Costly Heist Under the Cover of Darkness
Clarkson revealed the stolen Easycare sheep, a hardy British breed, carried a market value exceeding £2,000. Yet he suspects the losses may climb higher, fearing that livestock grazing in other fields across the sprawling property could also have been targeted.
The motoring personality suspects the theft was timed with military precision, happening either after dark or during a day when Prime Video’s cameras weren’t present. “There’s normally a film crew here all the time,” Clarkson noted, “and a drone in the air.”
When pressed on whether fame had painted a bullseye on his rural enterprise, he remained philosophical but blunt. “It’s more likely to make you a target than less, but I still don’t think they’ve been stolen because they’re on Diddly Squat.”
He added a stark reality of farming life: “How can you (stop it) if someone’s determined to steal your livestock? This is 1,000 acres, it’s a big farm. Anyone could be anywhere and you wouldn’t know.”
Police Involvement and a Recognisable Crime
The matter has since been reported to Thames Valley Police, with Clarkson’s land manager Charlie Ireland and Cooper themselves flagging the incident.
Navigating the bureaucratic maze of rural crime, Clarkson described his eventual breakthrough with authorities after battling through an astonishing 700 hours of recorded messages. When he finally reached a human voice, his opening line drew an unexpected moment of levity.
“I said, ‘I know it’s going to sound like I’m from 1856, but I’ve had some sheep stolen,'” Clarkson recounted. The officer’s response, however, caught him entirely off guard. After running through his details, she remarked: “Oh, not your Easycares.” Clarkson noted with amusement: “She’s obviously been watching the show, but it is the Easycares.”
His patience thoroughly exhausted, Clarkson issued a warning to anyone considering a repeat visit to his pastureland. “It’s a farm. We’re armed. Just so they know. It p* me off. Honestly, it just p* me off.”
Clarkson Pushes Forward Amid Personal Challenges
The theft comes during a particularly turbulent chapter in Clarkson’s life. Earlier this year, the broadcaster disclosed he had been diagnosed with an “aggressive” form of prostate cancer, a revelation that unfolded on screen during Clarkson’s Farm. Subsequent tests have brought more encouraging news: a PSA test in April reportedly showed no indicators of the disease, with Clarkson declaring he is now in remission.
On Wednesday evening, Clarkson stepped onto the red carpet for the premiere of the latest Grand Tour instalment on Prime Video. The series marks a significant changing of the guard, with Francis Bourgeois, Thomas Holland and James Englesman taking over the wheel from Clarkson and his long-time co-hosts James May and Richard Hammond.
Both Clarkson and Thames Valley Police have been approached for further comment.
Why it Matters
This incident lays bare the uncomfortable truth facing modern farmers, particularly those whose livelihoods have become intertwined with television fame. The theft underscores how high-profile agricultural ventures, while financially lucrative and culturally influential, can inadvertently advertise vulnerabilities to opportunistic criminals. For Clarkson, the crime represents more than lost livestock; it is an intrusion into the rural idyll that has captivated millions of viewers. As rural crime continues to plague the British countryside, the Diddly Squat theft serves as a high-profile reminder that even 1,000 acres and a watchful drone aren’t always enough to keep the determined at bay.
