In a heartfelt conversation, renowned ballroom dancer and Strictly Come Dancing judge Shirley Ballas opens up about her life, her bond with her mother, and the challenges of navigating both personal and professional storms. With a rich tapestry of experiences, Ballas reveals how her upbringing and family dynamics shaped her into the powerhouse she is today, while also addressing her mother’s ongoing health struggles.
A Journey Through Dance and Life
Born in 1960 in Wallasey, now part of Merseyside, Shirley Ballas is celebrated as one of the foremost figures in the world of ballroom and Latin dance. A three-time champion of the British Professional Latin Championship, she stepped away from competitive dancing in 1996 to embrace teaching and adjudicating, eventually joining the judging panel of BBC’s Strictly Come Dancing in 2017. Now residing in London with her mother, Audrey, who suffers from chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD), Ballas is also a passionate advocate for the Breathe Equal campaign, which aims to raise awareness about COPD and address the stigma surrounding it.
Recalling a poignant moment during a recent trip to Hawaii, Ballas shared, “I had saved up for a long time to take my mum on a cruise. It was wonderful, but I was heartbroken over a breakup. One morning at breakfast, I was crying, and she smacked me round the face. You bet I shut up after that. That’s old-school parenting for you.”
This anecdote captures the essence of their relationship—one built on tough love and mutual respect. Growing up in a single-parent household, Ballas learned resilience and independence from an early age, as her mother worked tirelessly to provide for the family. “We were taught to look after ourselves. By the time I was a teenager, I could cook a roast dinner and keep the house tidy,” she recalled, underscoring the values that shaped her character.
The Dance That Changed Everything
Shirley’s passion for dance ignited at the tender age of seven when she stumbled upon a cha-cha-cha class. “I rushed home to tell my mother, who, despite her concerns about the costs involved, encouraged me to pursue it. She worked multiple jobs to support my dreams, and I never lost the red makeup case she bought me,” Ballas reminisced.
Her journey into the world of dance was not without its challenges. Leaving home at just 14 to live with the parents of her first dance partner, Nigel Tiffany, marked a significant turning point. “Mum thought I’d be back in six weeks, but I stayed until I was 16. She always had my back, even when I didn’t always heed her advice,” Ballas reflected, acknowledging the wisdom of her mother, who advised against early marriage—a lesson she learned the hard way after two failed unions.
Navigating a Male-Dominated Industry
Ballas’s ascent in the competitive dance world was marred by bullying and sexism, particularly within a male-dominated industry. “It was tough; I faced mistreatment for over a decade. At one point, I contemplated leaving the industry altogether,” she admitted. However, her resilience paid off when she joined Strictly Come Dancing, a platform that not only elevated her career but also provided a voice against the injustices she’d faced. “The bullying diminished with my increased visibility. Ironically, had I been happier back then, I might never have sought out Strictly,” she mused.
Yet, the challenges did not cease with her professional successes. In 2022, Ballas faced a personal crisis when her mother was diagnosed with COPD. “I was initially unaware of the implications of the diagnosis. It means living with chronic conditions like bronchitis and emphysema that severely affect lung function,” she explained. “Watching my mother struggle to breathe has been heart-wrenching. Despite her stubbornness—refusing to use an inhaler or quit smoking—she continues to defy the odds at nearly 90, maintaining a spirit that inspires me.”
The Unbreakable Bond
Their relationship, while layered with complexity, is marked by an unwavering affection. “We have lived together most of our lives, and she is always waiting for me in her pink dressing gown when I return from filming. Her opinions on my performances matter deeply to me,” Ballas said, highlighting the unique rapport they share.
Audrey Ballas, in turn, expressed her pride in her daughter’s achievements. “I remember Shirley as a child; she was always striving to be the best. When she had a tantrum over not winning a singing competition, it was clear she was determined,” she shared, reflecting on their family dynamics. Despite her own health challenges, Audrey remains a source of support and humour, even planning her funeral in her own quirky way.
Why it Matters
Shirley Ballas’s story is not just one of fame and success; it is a testament to the strength of familial bonds and the resilience of the human spirit. As she navigates the complexities of her mother’s health struggles while thriving in her professional life, Ballas embodies the notion that love, hard work, and unwavering support from family can help one overcome even the most daunting obstacles. In an age where mental health and family dynamics are increasingly brought to the forefront, her journey reminds us of the importance of compassion and understanding in our personal and professional lives.